The Simonscans Porn Blog

Strange name? Not really, it comes from Euphrates the river.

Ikea and porn. Porn and Ikea. The two go hand in hand at porn locations, as you can clearly see in this is photo. Every single item of furniture, the wall hanging  and most of the soft furnishings are Ikea. The bed is SUNDNES, the big cushions are ALVINE FRÖ, the Da Vinci wall hanging RIDÅ.

It’s that time of year again - the time where I beg for some interesting places to shoot in the UK. Finding girls is not really too hard, but finding Locations is hell. We’ve tried real film unit location finding services, half won’t deal with porn, the other half wanted insane amounts of money to deal with porn.

Places we would like are:-

• Farms
• fields
• Barns
• Greenhouses
• Woodland
• Beach
• Caravans
• Boats
• Campsites
• Pubs
• Night Clubs
• Cinemas
• Theatres
• Gymns
• Bouncey castle!
• Trains
• Villas (Spain, not UK!)

Plus anything else you may have!

We get offered a lot of cars but have always had the same problem - we need somewhere quiet to park it and do the shoot!

In general we are looking for places we can use only in the afternoon and evenings - models can’t get up, ever! We’re fully house trained and insured. All that we ask is that the place you have on offer is yours to offer - its either yours directly, or you are able to give genuine permission. We are happy to pay - either in real money or in long free memberships.

Ideally we are looking for locations North of London, but South of Leeds - M1, A1, M40, M11 or A14 kinda thing, but would consider anywhere.

All aboard! We have a new tour. Confusingly, you may have arrived via the new tour in which case you have already seen it. But for existing members, Here it is in all its glory.

The big change is clearly that its a not only a lot better looking its also a lot bigger. When we came to do the redesign we realised very early on it was going to be a struggle to feature all the good stuff we had and the sheer size of the site if we had a small tour. So we thought, bugger it, we’ll have a large one. Funnily enough, that exact statement seems to be the answer to oh so many questions around here!

We looked at a few other sites before starting work, we even joined some. In every site we looked at, the same thing struck us; they have better tours, but the members areas aren’t as good or as large as Simonscans. So many sites these days call 40 images an update, what the hell is that about? So to show how things are different here we added the full update schedule to the tour - live from the main database, tourists can see every one of the last two months updates - sample images, update date and number of images.

Oh and unlike some other sites, we don’t hide the lame updates from non members.

Other changes include new Flash preview movies - these aren’t on the main site yet, but soon will be. Don’t worry, we won’t loose the old downloadable formats, but for previews and streaming (if that’s what you prefer) then Flash makes a lot of sense. Its certainly working out pretty OK for YouTube. The key benefit of the Flash previews are crazy small file size and almost universal playback on any computer - as long as it has Flash installed.

PS - If you do take the tour, any feedback or typo corrections would be gratefully received!